Me: *sucks dick for the first time* it’s too spicy
6x15, The French Mistake
my friend adopted a dog called Deeper and every time someone says “COME DEEPER!!” i lose my shit
"make up is false advertisement!"
"i view women as products"
If you went on a few dates with a charming, fit-looking guy, decided to invite him upstairs, and after he took off his shirt he unstrapped a hidden girdle and his massive gelatinous kegbelly rippled forth, you would be pissed too.
did you really just compare a woman putting some powder on her face to a guy literally reshaping his entire body
omfg so today I saw a man and a woman holding hands in public, i mean i don’t have anything against heterosexuality but don’t flaunt it in front of me, think of the kids omfg
I don’t have anything against it either. I really don’t. My best friend is straight, but like, keep it in the bedroom you know?
call the police
I brought my little brother Spencer as my date and when I told him I was nominated for this [Hot & Funny] award, he told me that if under any circumstances I won, I had to say the following things.
SLAAAAY TORONTO IM SO PROUD OF THIS